The Not-To-Do List: 15 Habits to Stop Now

Wayne Dyer told me, “Stop giving energy to the things you don’t want.” This advice changed my life. I realized that if we all followed a “Not To Do List,” then we would find a whole lot more time to guide our time towards what is important. 

Tim Ferriss, author of The Four-Hour Work Week gets straight to the point when he writes, “Not to do lists are often more effective than to-do lists for upgrading performance. The reason is simple: what you don’t do determines what you can do.”


So let’s keep things simple, here is a quick list of what “Not-to-Do” to live an inspired life.

  1. Don’t be mean or snarky. (Instead: Be kind.)
  2. Don’t judge. (Instead: Be receptive and open.)
  3. Don’t compare. (Instead: Recognize and celebrate others achievements.)
  4. Don’t disrespect. (Instead: Be respectful of other people, situations, time and things.)
  5. Don’t hold grudges. (Instead: Forgive people, situations and yourself.)
  6. Don’t be selfish. (Instead: Be thoughtful of others, life is not a game of solitaire.)
  7. Don’t be ungrateful. (Instead: Be content with what you have: it is always enough.)
  8. Don’t deny responsibility for the quality of your life. (Instead: Be responsible for your thoughts, emotions, body, and actions.)
  9. Don’t lose your sense of humor. (Instead: Be funny, laugh a lot – even at yourself.)
  10. Don’t assume the worst. (Be positive, hopeful and assume the best.)
  11. Don’t be stingy, (Be generous with everything especially your time, love, and money.)
  12. Don’t lose interest. (Be curious, creative and actively filled with wonder.)
  13. Don’t stop listening. (Be an active listener and hear what is not being said—and not said.)
  14. Don’t get stuck. (Be open to change and new perspectives.)
  15. Don’t act conceited and think you know everything. (Be a life long learner.  Never stop growing and humbly expanding your knowledge.)
And if you must have a To-Be List: (Better than a To-Do List)

  • Be kind.
  • Be receptive and open.
  • Be joyful. Celebrate others achievements and accomplishments.
  • Be thoughtful of others.
  • Be respectful of other people, situations, time and things.
  • Be forgiving of people, situations and yourself.
  • Be grateful and content with what you have, it is always enough.
  • Be responsible for your thoughts, emotions, body and actions.
  • Be funny, laugh a lot – even at yourself.
  • Be positive, hopeful and learn to assume the best.
  • Be generous with everything especially your time, energy, and money.)
  • Be curious, creative and actively filled with wonder.)
  • Be an active listener and hear what is not being said as much as what is not.
  • Be open to change and new perspectives.
  • Be a life long learner. Never stop growing and humbly expanding your knowledge.
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